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This specimen is a male. Theraphosa species are easy to sex because the males have a clearly visible dark triangle of epiandrous fusillae. Females of this species often have a prominent gonoslit.
N. coloratovillosus. Extremely food motivated, active, and defensive. Beautifully fluffy with pink setae around the edges. Always out looking for food. A bit cantankerous, but a great display animal!
The differences could be due to individual variation. They are not known to be sexually dimorphic before maturity. The most surefire way to sex them is to examine their molts.
I had my female P. cambridgei lay a phantom sac a few years ago. She was sexually mature at a smaller size than I expected. The sac contained 140 eggs. She cared for the sac for a few days as though it were fertile, but I eventually took it from her because she was on the thin side after...
Maybe for next time, you could try casting it in resin. My fiance has preserved hundreds of spiders, insects, and small fish this way. Some of the color fades over time, but it's a great way to display them, especially for smaller specimens.
Nobody is perfect. We're all human, and everyone makes mistakes eventually. I know how much it hurts to lose a spider though. It's amazing how attached we get to them. Sorry for your loss :( .