- Messages
- 108
Exactly this. if she loves you, she loves EVERYTHING about you. Whats next that shes gonna want to get rid of? Do you really want this? Not to be a Debbie Downer, but, just think about it BEFORE you get rid of your collection.
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Difficult choice :(
- Thread starter Wg25
- Start date
Exactly this. if she loves you, she loves EVERYTHING about you. Whats next that shes gonna want to get rid of? Do you really want this? Not to be a Debbie Downer, but, just think about it BEFORE you get rid of your collection.
- Messages
- 360
- Location
- Gauteng , South-Africa
Haha haha thanks MassExodus! Made me laugh! I already have a buyer for my C.fasciatum , G.rosea and sadly also my vagans....Just couldn't let go of my B.smithi or B.albopilosum! How much are Boehmei's worth where you are from? Bought my little sling about 3 months ago and man they are awesome! If I wasn't so exited to see him grow I would've maybe consider it ; ) hahahI have to agree with Roo and JC1, stand your ground man. It's a brutal thing to say, but I'll say it anyway. She's just a girlfriend, women come and go, saturday through sunday, monday... monday through sunday, yo. lmao...I'm really sorry, I couldn't resist...But seriously, if you need to sell them, hit me up. My choices would be the genic, the curly and the vagans. Love vagansWant to sell me the boehmei?
- Messages
- 360
- Location
- Gauteng , South-Africa
Believe me Rockpython...We've talked about this for so long and it always ends up in a fight. I guess getting to keep 3 is at least better than loosing all my babies! But I managed to talk her into letting me keep another one...so there is already progress hehe. I know it's only temporary....I've told her hundreds of times its my dream to one day have a Tarantula/ Exotic pet room!
Things like this make me grit my teeth,
if this is your dream....Then that should matter, your dreams are as important as hers, T's are small, clean and don't make any noise,
If it leads to a fight then shes not willing to compromise, 'letting' you keep 3 isn't compromise, its calling the shots.
Your not her child but her partner. Simply tell her you love her but your keeping your spiders and 'you'll' compromise by letting her pick the closet you keep them in. or offer to get a locking enclosure to keep them all in, maybe a nice used display case or glass doored hutch.
Build your shelfs lighting etc and keep them all.
- Messages
- 5,547
- Location
- Outside San Antonio, TX
I think they go for around 30 to 50 a sling, depending on size probably. I was just playing man, I'm actually looking for a mature female. But if you live in south Texas and don't want to ship I'll work a deal out with you
- Messages
- 37
- Location
- Northern Virginia
Short and sweet, Keep your T's and ask Her to tag along if she wants too, I promise that God made plenty of them for you
- Messages
- 198
- Location
- Portsmouth UK
If you live in the UK I would hold onto them for you until things blow over.
- Messages
- 142
I learned a long time ago to never let a woman be in control of any situation lol they thrive in that environment and will most certainly become adapt to that kind of living... all the time... for ever...................... and ever!!!
- Messages
- 800
- Location
- tyne & wear uk
- Messages
- 125
The way I see it, she knew of your hobby when she met you, and therefore knew what she was getting into. My partner and I had the same issue with my cats. He knew they came with the territory, and I wasn't budging on my ground. My pets go where I go. Don't want them in your living space? Don't move in with me. Case closed. We came to some compromises, but the cats remained in my care. I'm lucky he likes my spiders, and actively participates in my hobby. But if he wasn't, it would have been a deal breaker, just like if he couldn't cope with living with my cats. Good luck, my friend. Sorry you're going through this situation.
- Messages
- 360
- Location
- Gauteng , South-Africa
Thanks a lot! Appreciate it : )
- Messages
- 194
Just tell her you've narrowed you're collection down to 2 groups of 3 plus 1 lol
In all seriousness though,
I think her forcing you to make a decision is wrong. You need to try and stand your ground on this, these T's are your babies! They're not f'ing Pokemon cards... They didn't decide to live at your house, you went out and bought them, with the sole purpose to raise them healthy and proper, you've spent time researching all these species and for what? So she can come along and make a decision for you, AND for them? You'll do whatever you can I'm sure...Goodluck!
In all seriousness though,
I think her forcing you to make a decision is wrong. You need to try and stand your ground on this, these T's are your babies! They're not f'ing Pokemon cards... They didn't decide to live at your house, you went out and bought them, with the sole purpose to raise them healthy and proper, you've spent time researching all these species and for what? So she can come along and make a decision for you, AND for them? You'll do whatever you can I'm sure...Goodluck!
- Messages
- 360
- Location
- Gauteng , South-Africa
Exactly how I feel! Making a choice between pets is the hardest thing to do. I love them all for different reasons! And love having a variety of different species! Thanks N8tive556 appreciate it!
- Messages
- 10,913
- Location
- Malton, UK
My worry would be, what is she going to force you into next? Will you dress the way she wants you to, buy the car she likes even though you'll be using it, only listen to the music she likes, drop all your friends because she doesn't like them but have to tolerate hers?
- Messages
- 360
- Location
- Gauteng , South-Africa
I wasn't asking for relationship advice Enn49.Just which one you'd chose. I am my own person. Making sacrifics is part of being in a relationship. She has made changes for me and vice versa. She knows I love T's. But the place where are moving into is extremely small. And like I said....We will talk about me extending my collection. Buy for the time being I will accept giving up a few. She knows ill never give up the hobby.
- Messages
- 10,913
- Location
- Malton, UK
Sorry, I just wanted to make sure you'd thought it through, which you obviously have, so I'll say no more.
- Messages
- 360
- Location
- Gauteng , South-Africa
You are making me feel bad Enn49. Sorry if I came across as an asshole...not my intentions! I appreciate you telling me how you feel! I need more honest advice like this! Makes me think before making decisions like that...
- Messages
- 10,913
- Location
- Malton, UK
Don't feel bad. I'm glad if it made you stop and think though. Life can be made miserable for a person with a domineering partner but as long as she is prepared to give as well as take you'll be ok. Fingers crossed she'll fall in love with Ts like I did and you'll be able to get more soon.
- Messages
- 246
- Location
- Surrey, England
I can see both sides of this. If she's affraid then in her mind, since she is completely naive to the world of tarantulas shes bound to ask you to ditch them and it becomes down to the principle of the matter. She doesn't like them is scared and wants you to sacrifice them for her. If she means that much to you you'd do this. Which you have done and is good. It is slightly selfish of her but forgive her for the fact she is naive about them. Now if you compromise with her and show your willing commitment by giving away part of your collection, which she knows is important to you, even give her time to ajust I bet you a million you'll probably find it easier than you think to rebuild your collection. Unfortunately she may have the slight higher ground on this as if she's a phobia shes within her right to ask this of you. This isn't so much of advice for you as you seem pretty level headed about it, but others pushing you towards a pointless argument by you standing your ground will most likely ruin a supposed special time of your life and moving in with the one you love.
- Messages
- 173
I can not tell you witch I would keep. I could not make a chose like that. I can tell you though I got my first A avicularia about 4 years ago. My girl friend hated it, she said I could never get more then 3 and never one over 5 inches. I now have five and as long as we have money she does not care how many I get. Also the next one that she wants me to get is a G. pulchripes. So not only do I think in time you will be able to get more, she will develop some interest in them as well. Even if she never says so her self as my girl friend still says she hates them, but at the same time she tells me a few she wants me to get.
